Pro or Against Adoption? An adoptee perspectivePublished January 9, 2013 , By Laura
When I first heard about the Russian ban on U.S. adoptions, I’ll admit it. At first I was like, “Ohhh, those poor, little, languishing, ignored, suffering orphans!” How can they do that? Putin is such an arrogant bastard (in the figurative sense, of course, since literally, I am one)! … And then I read on, researching non-U.S. media. I educated myself and thought I’d share my views.
Here’s the down-low.
How to *Really* Help
If a teenager or young woman comes to you and says, “I’m pregnant,” the first response ought to be: “What can I do to help you?”
- not, the oft-repeated male-perspective, seeming ‘forward-thinking phrase’: “What are you going to do about it?”
- not, “Have you considered abortion?”
- not even the so-called Christian solution, “Have you considered adoption?”
Adoption is the last. resort. solution.
Family preservation ought to be the goal, first-and-foremost. Babies are meant to be with their mothers. Adoption may always exist, but infant adoption in which couples pay exorbitant amounts to procure a baby … should to be reduced and regulated as much as possible. This might sound like an outlandish statement coming from an adopted woman who loves her adoptive family. No matter, I believe history will come out on my side.
The U.S. foster care system ought to be the first (relatively cost-free) resource for adopting a child or a baby. Yes, it’s true! You can adopt a healthy baby from the foster care system!
Russia’s ban on international adoption
Let’s put aside the international finger-pointing that has been going on, as well as the fact that this ban actually affects approximately 46 children who were in the process of being adopted into the U.S. Forty-six. Not the 600,000 children in Russian orphanages.
But, ohhh! You said, over half-a-million orphans are suffering! How can we ignore them?
Welllll, we, too, have our very own domestic “orphan problem.” There are 400,000+ children in foster care, waiting to be adopted (2010*).
Consider the following statement:
Russia has a struggling government, with an unhappy (divided) populace that is fed-up with political corruption where the rich only get richer. The country is likely guilty of human rights violations, but we will never know if they are “truly” guilty (you know, innocent until proven guilty, one of America’s most basic tenets), because they don’t recognize The Hague’s International Court.
The same could be said for good ol’ United States of America.
Next … think on this:
The U.S., Canada, and countries of Western Europe do not allow international adoption. I know, crazy, right? A French couple can’t simply show up in an Indiana adoption agency, flash around $50k, take care of some arduous documentation, aaaand eventually go home with a baby born in America.
That would be appalling!
So, someone remind me again, Why is it so bad that Russia had banned U.S. international adoptions?
* Child Welfare Information Gateway 2010
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P.S. I just got information from Amanda at The Declassified Adoptee that out of those 400,000 about 100,000 to 120,000 are legally cleared and waiting to be adopted. The rest are attempting to be reunited with their biological families; just showing how some parts of the U.S. government value blood ties, even if they are the extended family.
Image from freedigitalphotos.net
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