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A Friendly Letter from Home

by Laura on May 13th, 2013

In today’s dispatch from the other side of the world from me, your semi-snarky Serbian attaché–we have panic-inducing, fear-mongering cautionary “letters from home.” (Thanks to my friend, Corie Skolnick for the catchy “attaché” moniker.)

Just kidding, this wasn’t the exact language used.

Nevertheless, on increasingly frequent basis, I receive letters courtesy of my friendly neighborhood United States of America Embassy.

No doubt, Big Brother is in on it.* I had provided my email and cell phone to the Embassy–for the sole reason to be alerted as to when my daughter’s passport would become available. I did NOT sign up to receive these messages–via email or text message.

Curiously, there’s no “unsubscribe” button. Awesome.

News from the Embassy

Dateline Thursday, May 9, 2013

The U.S. Embassy informs U.S. citizens that the Serbian nationalist group NASI will hold a rally in downtown Belgrade tomorrow, Friday, May 10 to protest adoption of the Kosovo agreement. The protest is scheduled to begin at 12:44 p.m. in Republic Square (Trg Republike).

Organizers expect several thousand participants, and a heavy police presence is planned in the vicinity of the protest and throughout downtown Belgrade. Embassy personnel have been advised to avoid the area.

Just to clarify, what they really meant was Naši, pronounced Nashi, which means “ours” in Serbian. Also, U.S. intelligence was either faulty or  not complete. Naši was not the only group who helped organize the rally. It’s been reported by local Serbian media that the Democratic Party of Serbia, Serbs from the disputed territory in Northern Kosovo, and students from Belgrade also attended, along with a bishop from the Serbian Orthodox Church.

Details, shme-tails.

From RTS — Radio-Television Serbia

 The Embassy goes on to admonish:

We remind U.S. citizens that even demonstrations intended to be peaceful can become violent and unpredictable. You should avoid the areas around this event if possible, and exercise caution if you are within the vicinity of any large gatherings, protests, or demonstrations. Try to stay current with media coverage of local events and be aware of your surroundings at all times.

Review your personal security plans, remain aware of your surroundings, including local events, monitor local news stations for updates, and report specific incidences of targeted violence to the U.S. Embassy in Belgrade at the number below. Maintain a high level of vigilance and take appropriate steps to enhance your personal security.

Okay everybody, don’t get your panties in a bunch be alarmed. Belgrade is a very safe city, even for young women and children. The biggest “danger” of these protests is traffic … if you’re not up-to-date, you may inadvertently try to drive through a cordoned-off section of town; delaying your arrival by thirty minutes.

Are other Western countries so overly suspicious?

I checked with my friend, Bex, a British expat who used to live in Greece. Although the British government doesn’t constantly send her “security messages,” she had an American expat friend who received near daily warnings about the various austerity-measures protests.

My Canadian friend here in Serbia said that the only messages he receives from his embassy is party invitations. Good times. 

For a country like the United States who prides itself on our right to assembly, our right to free speech, and or right to protest against our government’s decisions, it seems we are pretty paranoid when others do the same.

Serbia has a democratically elected government, and it’s sad that it seems to be U.S. policy to be so reactionary towards peaceful protests. Just sayin’.

Questions for readers: Have other U.S. citizens living abroad had similar experiences? What about other expats and immigrants, what’s been the response of your home country to you living abroad? Serbs: does the Serbian government send you updates when shit goes down in America?

*  *  *  *  *

* Dear CIA and Department of Homeland Security: Please don’t put me on any watch lists. It’s all in good fun :)

“Stars And Floor Background” by Rawich from freedigitalphotos.net

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11 Comments
  1. I hope warning messages don't go out about the peaceful Adoptee Rights Demonstration in Atlanta this summer!! But I'm wearing my bullet-proof vest just in case:)

    • Laura permalink

      HA! Yes, and plexi-glass face mask, a must have for the fashionable protester!

  2. zygotepariah permalink

    "My Canadian friend here in Serbia said that the only messages he receives from his embassy is party invitations. Good times."

    Oh, my goodness. As a Canadian, this made me laugh. So hard.

    Even our politicians, including our Prime Minister, often appear on a national comedy show to spoof themselves. It's all just a big party here in Canada. :P

    • Laura permalink

      I'm glad you got a laugh today … it's so interesting to me how the U.S. and Canada can be neighbors and have such a different cultural outlook :)

  3. Na, they've got better things to do like keeping the economy sound and issueing apologies to adoptees and mothers for the inhumanity of adoption.Besides we Aussies love to party, any excuse for a sausage sizzle!

    • Laura permalink

      Von! Thanks — that's so interesting, I guess it's just we Americans who are so overly concerned about liability and potential security threats. I have to know … what the heck is a sausage sizzle?

  4. Sheesh over the top of what!

  5. I never hear a thing from the French embassy in London. They have my mobile and my email, but I simply never hear from them. Ever. At least you know that they haven't forgotten you…

  6. Mrs. Bo permalink

    Lol. Love your version of their warning emails

  7. There is a big message in this letter that we are supposed to understand if we are a true American citizen. I am sure to pay attention to these types of things all the time.

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