Expat Revelations: On the Global State of Popcorn

I just wanted popcorn for the kids.

Plain with a little bit of salt.

Popcorn is nearly fat-free, and if my children want to eat half the bag in one sitting, so be it. Hey, it’s high in fiber!

Hello, my name is Laura, and I keep track of my kids’ No. 2. I admit, I am mildly-but-constantly concerned about the “state of poop” of my offspring. Gross but true. I will go out on a limb and state that I am not alone in this.

A normal bag of popcorn in Serbia weighs 60 grams (2.12 ounces), about six cups.

At approx. 47 calories in one cup, lightly salted popcorn = a tasty, healthy and filling movie-time snack.

 

Expat Revelation #1: Popcorn in America, not a healthy snack

I’ve lived in Serbia for three years now. When I recently visited Maryland with Danica (5.5) and Maksim (3.5), I knew there would be surprises–large and small, important and inconsequential. (Feel free to decide for yourself in what category popcorn falls.)

Because I was out-of-my-mind exhausted and therefore quite unable to string together several sentences jetlagged, my mom and cousin set out to find some popcorn for me. Admittedly, in my jetlaggedness (not a word), I may have been unable to explain clearly that I wanted a bag of popcorn and a bag of Pirate’s Booty (it’s like cheesy Smoki, without the peanut or the protein). (i.e. I didn’t want both in the same bag.)

What they found surprised me.

How could the “healthiest” popcorn have 10 GRAMS OF FAT in ONE cup?! How is that healthy? How could I hand my kids the bag and simply let them eat their fill?*

It was explained to me that there were approximately ten different varieties at CVS (yes, drug stores sell snacks in America, go figure), and that this is the healthiest one.

Aaaarrgghhh America! No wonder we have a childhood obesity problem!

You see, I had my Serbian goggles on. At home, each morning I go to the market (locally owned, 70-90% smaller than a normal 7-Eleven, not a chain) and I buy what we need for the day.

There, I can choose among two types of popcorn:

“Fine salty popcorn” in a small bag, and

“Fine salty popcorn” in a large bag.

That’s it. Granted, there are more brands at larger supermarkets. But generally, it’s take it or leave it, or learn to like it.

For the small bag, there is 13 grams of fat in THE ENTIRE PACKAGE, a little more than 2 grams of fat in a 1-cup serving. Please, do not hold me accountable for my math. I did check it, but I am still mildly jetlagged.

 

 

Expat Revelation #2: Grocery stores in America = bastions of overwhelming consumerism variety

So I went to the store to check it out myself. Surely, I can find a bag of popcorn (no, I didn’t want the microwave kind) that doesn’t have 10 grams of fat in one cup.

I went to a large chain supermarket in suburbia. It was a little overwhelming … did I really use to spend that much time shopping and driving back-and-forth to the store? I digress.

“Look, kids! Isn’t this cool—floor-to-ceiling snacks! You can pick whatever you want! Look how much there is to choose from!”

Silence. Aaaannnd my kids returned to playing together in the large-enough-to swaddle-a-baby-elephant shopping cart. Apparently, they were unimpressed by American hyper-consumerism.

 

Expat Revelation #3: Don’t think too hard about all the chemicals

However, we all did enjoy the firm, seedless grapes. (Not really a thing in Serbia.)

Danica thought I was messing with her assuring her that she didn’t need to dissect the seed from each-and-every grape. “Just try it! I’m not lying! There are no seeds inside!”

It did disturb me just a little that both the popcorn and the grapes stayed fresh for a week. Just imagine what they are putting in them to keep them that way! Or better yet, don’t.

* That was a non-issue. Turns out, they didn’t even like it.